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So you’ve noticed that in our videos we’ve been talking a lot about communication. So I wanted to take a minute to drive home a crucial point (and one I’m still learning) about effective communication.
I read a blog post recently from #mindfulmft that talked about the need for validation. This hit home... “validating someone else’s feelings does not mean you’re invalidating your own.” 🤯
That’s deep. For a long while many of us (maybe just me) felt like creating space for another person to share their innermost feelings meant that ours (mine) didn’t matter. But that’s not true is it? That’s merely the game we play in our minds that keep us stuck, frustrated, resentful, mean, passive aggressive (I’m guilty) and incapable of addressing or at the very least allowing room for each other’s experiences and feelings.
So here’s the trick to communication...
We have a responsibility to share how we feel. We have a responsibility to share how we feel in ways that honors each other’s boundaries but also leaves room for us to express ourselves authentically. We have a responsibility to allow each other to have thoughts and emotions that we may not always understand. And we have a responsibility to recognize when we seek to shut someone down or attempt to rename their experience as something it’s not that we are making attempts to mold that individuals experience to match what we find more palpable. Always remember, creating space for someone else doesn’t mean you disappear, it means you create an opportunity to learn more about the individual and how best you vibe or don’t vibe. It’s all communication.